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The Wedding, Part II

Saying I was busy the day before my wedding is a understatement on the order of “Kevin Bacon has appeared in a movie.”  I woke up in my childhood bedroom at 6 a.m., and by 6:15 it was clear that I should have gotten up at 4.  The fudge pies and lemon cake were in various stages of un-bakedness in the kitchen, and the dogs were clamoring for breakfast.  The welcome bags, which hadn’t made it to the hotel the night before, were spreading their good cheer through the trunk of my mother’s car.  The programs and menus were ready for pick up at the copy shop, and three buckets of wildflowers stood on the dining room table, waiting for someone in my family to tap into a previously undiscovered well of artistic talent and wrangle them into bouquets.  Thunder’s new sparkly collar and the flower girl’s ribboned headpiece were somewhere in the basement, where they would remain for the duration of the weekend–the first casualties of the chaos that had befallen my parents’ household.

And yet, I wasn’t nervous.  The chance of rain was only 10%.  I finally had an idea of what I wanted to say when I wrote my vows, eventually.  My bridesmaids had made it to town–even the one who drove ten hours with her drugged up husband after he had an emergency appendectomy and they missed their flights.  Overall, things were looking good.  I had only one concern the day before my wedding, and it was whether the groomsmen would be wearing pants.

Scott had emailed his groomsmen about their pants six weeks before the wedding.  I know this because I saw the email myself.  It included several links to acceptable pants choices.  The links worked.  I know this because later, when we found out that none of the groomsmen had actually purchased any pants, we went back and checked.  The email also included information about buying a vest (link included) and when to show up at the rehearsal.

Two weeks before the wedding, we discovered that the groomsmen had deleted Scott’s email, or interpreted it as optional, or just had no intention of wearing pants at all.  I called their wives, who indicated that their husbands lacked the life skills necessary to interpret organizational emails, especially ones related to pants, and who promised to rectify the situation immediately.

Of course, by that point the pants were sold-out in many sizes, so alternate pants had to be located by the wives, photographed, and sent to Scott for approval, and then purchased and hemmed.  The change in the color of the pants required a change in the color of the vests, which is why the day before the wedding I had no idea who was wearing what, or whether the men would still be milling about the clearance section of J. Crew while the rest of us sat down to the rehearsal dinner.

In the end, it worked out fine.  And by that I mean the bridesmaids wore neutral colors and the groomsmen showed up in a dazzling array of mismatched attire that would have knocked their own socks off, had any of them remembered to wear socks.

pie batterThe fudge pies did get made that day, believe it or not.  We served them alongside banana cream pies, which I wrote about herefudge pieThis pie is amazing.  Truly–it’s one of my favorite finds of 2014.  It’s like a gooey brownie crossed with dark chocolate pudding inside a tender crust.  You can make the batter  quickly in one bowl without a stand mixer.  It melts in your mouth.

fudge pie sliceThe nuts here are optional.  Pants are not.

Fudge Pie {Download & Print Recipe}
Adapted from a recipe in Encore! Nashville by Southern Living magazine, and reworded by me

Ingredients:

2/3 c. evaporated milk

6 oz. semisweet chocolate chips

2 Tbsp. butter

1 c. sugar

2 Tbsp. flour

2 eggs

2 tsp. vanilla

3/4 tsp. kosher salt (use about half this amount if you only have regular salt)

1 c. chopped pecans (optional)

1 unbaked, deep dish pie shell, thawed

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

Melt the evaporated milk, chocolate chips and butter together in a saucepan or in the microwave.  Stir the mixture until it’s smooth.

Whisk the sugar and the flour into the chocolate mixture.  Then whisk in the eggs, vanilla, salt and pecans (if using).

Pour the mixture into the pie shell and bake for 35-40 minutes, until the top of the pie isn’t jiggly and it has set.  Let it cool for at least 10 minutes before eating, or chill in the refrigerator and serve cold.

~~~

Seymour at dog beach Seymour goes for a pre-wedding swim.

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53 Comments Post a comment
  1. Joy #

    I need pictures!!!

    August 13, 2014
    • Aaaaah me too, Joy! I don’t know when the photographer is going to get them back to me and I don’t want to pester him but I am so excited to see how they turned out. I will share them when I get them, for sure.

      August 13, 2014
  2. Jean G. WOODHOUSE #

    8-13-2014

    I must have missed a post. Just recently learned of the wedding.

    How about you?

    August 13, 2014
    • Hi Jean! Well, I took at least a month off of writing. I didn’t mean to, but then things got nuts. I wrote a post a few days ago about preparing for the wedding, but I definitely did not write about how it was all coming together in the month or so leading up to it. But now that it’s over, I’m back at it! Things are good (and much calmer) now!

      August 13, 2014
  3. I am having a Pavlovian response to this recipe.

    August 13, 2014
    • Dude. It’s amazing. I made it again last night to photograph it and I was going to take it to the neighbors since I’ve had it so many times and didn’t need to taste-test it, but then Scott and I devoured some after dinner because we couldn’t just let it sit there looking delicious.

      August 13, 2014
  4. Mom #

    That pie looks scrumptious! Wish I’d gotten to the dessert table before it disappeared. Mom

    August 13, 2014
    • Alas! Same goes for the fruit pies Nancy made.

      August 13, 2014
  5. Hahahaha, the pants fiasco is such an accurate description of so many men I know. “I called their wives, who indicated that their husbands lacked the life skills necessary to interpret organizational emails, especially ones related to pants.” — perfectly stated. Also, would it be creepy if I said I kind of want you to narrate my life? Yeah, that would be creepy, nevermind.

    August 13, 2014
    • Give me some of that sparkling cherry limeade of yours and I will *attempt* to do anything, Willow! It looks so good. I freaking love cherries. They might be my favorite fruit, along with nectarines.

      August 13, 2014
  6. So I see now that you’re one of those darn anti-buttcheek-while-eating-pie people. If I’d have known you were “pro-pants” I never would have come here. I feel cheated and mislead. I don’t think we can be friends anymore. Right after I totally eat all your pie while my butt is shining out in all its dimpled glory.

    August 13, 2014
  7. Mary Corbett #

    Okay, I did not see that pie at the wedding so clearly someone got there ahead of me and made off with the whole thing. Amazing! Can’t wait to try. Second, the e-mail about pants should never have gone to the groomsmen in the first place! Precious time was lost by letting it fester in their inboxes. In the end, everyone looked great, most especially the gorgeous and talented bride.

    August 13, 2014
  8. Groomsmen without pants? Now that would have been a wedding to remember! Still, even though they managed to turn up more or less clothed, I’m sure your wedding was memorable anyway. And not only because of that luscious fudge pie. It was a big mistake to read this post so close to lunchtime, BTW.

    I love the casual, relaxed vibe of your wedding (or at least as you now recount it). I’m starting to plan my own wedding and just about the only thing I know right now is that I want it to be casual and relaxed (why do I have the feeling you’re laughing right now?). And no karaoke machine, lol.

    August 13, 2014
  9. The day before my wedding, my parents got drunk at lunch with my mother in law and step father in law. I was off picking up my dress when I got a panicked phone call from my husband to be. They were all at the tux shop trying on their pants. The first time I met my father in law and step mom in law to be went like this…
    “Hi so nice to meet you at last – I am sorry my mom bust into your dressing room and saw you in your underwear – excuse me I have to go far away now”
    At the rehearsal my mom was still drunk and my mother in law and step father in law were sleeping off the liquid lunch in their hotel room
    Everything went fine on the day – Looking forward to your pant pics 🙂

    August 13, 2014
    • This is, well, amazing. I don’t *think* anyone saw ME in my underwear on the day before the wedding, but it’s quite possible that I am blocking it out. Thankfully, I have no idea how drunk people got at the wedding because I myself had my head in the clouds, but I do remember handing people bottles of wine to take on the bus back to town. Your parents and parents-in-law sound like a total hoot. I wish I had invited them.

      August 13, 2014
      • I have a million stories LOL Everyone had a blast on the day – it was one of the best weddings ever – not just because it was mine – but because everyone seemed to genuinely have fun and we didn’t sweat the small stuff. I had also forbidden karoke but by the end of the night a few of the die hard partiers did it anyway – good times. My family are available for parties, bar mitzvahs and any social occasion that needs a little extra “color” LOL

        August 13, 2014
  10. this post is hilarious. Congrats, Katherine!!

    August 13, 2014
  11. DP #

    1) My husband had on socks. I know because he needed me to pick out which socks matched his yellow pants and vest as he packed AN HOUR BEFORE WE LEFT FOR THE AIRPORT.
    2) At some point during the night my husband pointed out that your new husband was wearing light tan linen pants…. over dark undergarments (boxer briefs?) Once I saw it I could not unsee it. Welcome to the world of needing to micromanage your husband’s wardrobe! 🙂 (Don’t worry, you *could not tell* unless it was pointed out, and only then in certain light. But it made me smile.)

    August 13, 2014
    • That is HILARIOUS. All of it. I love it.

      August 13, 2014
  12. Oh my gosh, both of these posts are cracking me up so far — you are the best. I’m loving living your wedding vicariously (and it makes me feel better about the mishaps I just know are coming my way in a year!) I love your attitude throughout it all, too. You rock. And UGH THIS FUDGE PIE IS TOO MUCH and I want an entire one in my face.

    August 13, 2014
  13. Oh my gosh, both of these posts are cracking me up so far — you are the best. I’m loving living your wedding vicariously (and it makes me feel better about the mishaps I just know are coming my way in a year!) I love your attitude throughout it all, too. You rock. And UGH THIS FUDGE PIE IS TOO MUCH and I want an entire one in my face.

    August 13, 2014
    • Your wedding is going to be great and I can’t WAIT for you to write about it. About your post today: how many people do you think might come? You might not be at that stage yet, but the reason I ask is: would you really need to freeze the layers if you made the cakes yourself? Since I was adamant about baking my desserts, I built time into the schedule for baking the three days leading up to the wedding, and I had a friend come early to help, and it worked GREAT. We did make use of the extra fridge my parents have in the basement, though. We dropped the desserts off with the caterer the morning of the wedding, and the caterer chilled whatever needed to be chilled. We had 130 people at ours. Some ideas had to go by the wayside (for example, no whipped cream on the banana pies because it would have deflated), but overall it was pretty doable. This isn’t to say you should do it or you’ll regret not doing it–I’m just saying that lots of people told me it was crazy to bake the desserts, but they were speaking from their own experience and priorities. For me, it was a JOY to bake right before the wedding. And since I knew going into it that it would be a fun part of wedding prep for me, I arranged the schedule around it and it worked out fine.

      August 13, 2014
  14. I borderline wish they hadn’t shown up in any pants at all- that would have been a story! I can only imagine what their poor wives went through planning their own weddings. Also, that fudge pie looks delish- I am a sucker for anything sweet.

    August 13, 2014
    • I thought of that too–like, how did these dudes make it to their own weddings in the first place?!

      August 19, 2014
  15. Congratulations- I hope that you got to enjoy your wedding. That pie looks yummy.

    August 13, 2014
    • Thank you so much! It was such a blast. Thunder performed admirably, it turned out.

      August 19, 2014
  16. Oh you poor dear! That sounds awful, hilarious, but awful. i’m glad they all remembered to wear some pants, if not necessarily the CORRECT pants! I love the fudge pie idea. When I was a kid I **LOVED** those hand-held fudge pies. I think I fueled many of my childhood growth spurts with them. Now this one is calling my name…

    oh, btw, CON-FREAKING-GRATULATIONS!!!!

    August 13, 2014
    • Thank you, Natalie! In addition to making desserts, I bought some gluten-free macaroons but forgot to tell the gluten-free guests, so they were gobbled up by the gluten-loving guests, which is just one of the many things you can’t control but make the day funny.

      August 19, 2014
  17. I have got to see the pants that the guys wore now. Never a dull moment in planning and getting to the alter! Cannot wait to see pictures of the BIG Day 🙂

    August 13, 2014
    • I can’t wait for pictures either! Our photographer was awesome–a sommalier turned wedding photographer who totally got that we wanted pictures of people’s expressions rather than photos of my shoes, or of our wedding rings lying on top of rose petals, etc.

      August 19, 2014
  18. jenny_o #

    Looking forward to seeing the pictures! And I think you were amazing to make the desserts for your own wedding – you must be exceptionally organized!

    August 13, 2014
    • Jenny, I would have been a mess on my own but I had (1) a friend to help and parents to get ingredients in advance of my arrival, and (2) an amazing excel spreadsheet that I’d made over the course of a couple of weeks that told me what to do when. With all that help, it was a breeze!

      August 19, 2014
  19. I absolutely love your writing. Congratulations on the wedding and for keeping your sense of humor and enjoying the day! Also, thank you for that pie recipe. It looks amazing!

    August 13, 2014
    • Thank you so much, Melissa. I was really looking forward to writing this post, so your kind words mean a lot to me.

      August 19, 2014
  20. Stephbo #

    I wish someone could explain to me why it is that most of the powerful positions in the world are held by men. Everyone knows that without women’s organizational skills, they can’t even follow simple instructions.

    How does this pie’s taste and texture differ from a chocolate chess pie?

    Looking forward to the pix!

    August 13, 2014
    • Ok, now I need to make a chocolate chess pie because I don’t know!! Let’s just say that it’s not custardy or caramelized-sweet. It almost doesn’t taste baked. It tastes more like a thick creamy pudding. You definitely don’t taste anything eggy in this pie. I looked at some recipes for chocolate chess pie and it seems like the main difference is that this one calls for evaporated milk and chess pies don’t. Perhaps that’s why this one tastes like a deep chocolatey, creamy pudding (but better).

      August 19, 2014
  21. As someone who costumes forgetful children on a regular basis, I can see some mistakes were made here.

    First off, no costuming choices should ever be given. (Well, Patti, when you become a ballet teacher, YOU can pick the costumes. Until then, I’m getting paid to do it.) Second, I keep all costumes with me until the last possible moment. (There’s no way Patti’s dad is going to remember to bring a costume AND her ballet slippers to the theatre.) Third, I’m in charge of quality control/inspection. (That’s on backwards, Patti. No. Not that way. Come here. COME. HERE. Wait. Where did that scrunchie come from? I said no scrunchies. NO SCRUNCHIES.)

    You obviously needed a stage manager. I’m sorry I let you down.

    August 14, 2014
    • Two weeks before the wedding, Scott was like “maybe I should ask the guys what they’d rather wear, since clearly they don’t like the outfits or they would have bought them already.” I was like ARE YOU NUTS? DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES OFFER THEM CHOICES. NOT AT THIS POINT, NOT AT ANY POINT–PRESENT, PAST OR FUTURE. Of course, if we had offered them the choice of buying the damn pants or wearing Patti’s scrunchie and ballet slippers, they probably would have bought the pants a lot faster than they did.

      August 19, 2014
  22. Amy #

    Oy, we had a similar pants situation with our wedding. I gave the groomsmen a list of things to buy (ANY khakis, plain buttondown white shirt with link to online included, brown shoes if none were owned) and somehow they all waited til the last minute. Luckily I bought the suspenders and ties for them or I’m sure that would not happened. Ugh, BOYS!!! So glad it all worked out in the end for you and I’m sure no one but you noticed that they weren’t the original pants you had intended on 😉
    Um, this pie looks frickin amazing. I’m so making it. Your desserts all sound incredible! Can’t wait to see wedding pics 🙂

    August 14, 2014
    • RIGHT?!! Why are they like that? Scott’s the same way when it comes to buying flights for trips. He waits until the last second and then they’re crazy expensive/not available.

      August 19, 2014
  23. I’m hoping Seymour did the after-swim dog-shake all over the bedazzled groomsmen. More splash for less money.

    August 15, 2014
    • Sandy Sue, yeah well Seymour definitely. . . was not present at the wedding festivities. He stayed at my parents’ house that day and played with both dog and people friends. He’s just a little too barky to be a wedding guest. We felt bad but made up for it in treats. 🙂

      August 19, 2014
  24. Best. Wedding narrative. Ever.

    Wishing you and Scott many continued years of love and shared hilarity!

    August 15, 2014
    • Thank you so much, Jennifer! We are going to a friend’s wedding this weekend and I’m kind of excited to relive all the excitement involved in a wedding day.

      August 19, 2014
  25. I cannot wait to see the pictures, especially how the groomsmen were dressed. I hope it’s as fantastic as I have it pictured in my head. And that pie…looks amazing. I just showed it to my mom and we both looked at each other, reading each others minds….we.must.make.this.

    August 15, 2014
    • We got some photos back! But only 80. I am going to wait until we get them all and then I’m going to go through the whole bunch and post some. Stay tuned!

      August 19, 2014
  26. christine #

    I made this pie. I took away some of the evaporated milk and substituted it with Godiva chocolate liqueur. It was epic. 🙂

    August 19, 2014
    • Christine, that is an amazing idea to use the Godiva! I am so glad that you made it and liked it. Thank you for telling me. Makes my day. 🙂

      August 19, 2014

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