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Posts from the ‘humor’ Category

Fixed It.

Last week, sometime after bringing the 40th bag of trash to the curb and opening the 7th bag of Thai take-out, we moved.

take out 2We didn’t move far–just down the street to a smaller, cozier house with a bigger yard–so I didn’t feel any pressure to pack far in advance.  I boxed up the cereal bowls one day, the spoons the next.  I unplugged the toaster oven and dumped out the crumbs [cue the world's tiniest bicep flex] and over the weekend I brought some potted plants to the new house and positioned them by the front door like a parsley garnish, as if to say “Et voilà!  This place is ready to go!”

I was feeling pretty good about my progress until I woke up from a nap at the old house and took a moment to peer under the bed.  The experience was not unlike snorkeling over a coral reef, except the view in this case was of a colorful assortment of socks, balled-up t-shirts, cookbooks, Chapsticks, tennis balls, iPhone cords, and dust clumps.

So I started packing in earnest.

I didn’t get much support from the crew over here, by the way.  Seymour was particularly unhelpful.

Seymour As an adieu to the old house, I baked bran muffins before turning the oven off for good.  I made two versions–one batch that was time-consuming and fancy, and one that was quick and easy.

bran muffinsThe recipe that didn’t require toasting wheat bran and pureeing raisins was way better.  The muffins were moist and slightly sweet, with lots of rich, nutty bran flavor and little chunks of apple.

bran muffins I haven’t cooked in the new house yet.  Any ideas?

Apple Bran Muffins
Adapted from this recipe.

Ingredients:

1 1/2 c. wheat bran

1 c. buttermilk (if you only have whole milk, go here)

1/3 c. vegetable oil

1 egg

2/3 c. brown sugar

1 tsp. vanilla

1 c. flour

1 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. baking powder

1/2 tsp. salt

1 small to medium apple, peeled and diced into 1/2″ cubes (about 1 c.)

Directions

Heat the oven to 375 degrees.

Combine wheat bran and buttermilk in a medium bowl and let sit for 10 minutes.

In a separate large bowl, mix the oil, egg, sugar and vanilla.

In a separate small bowl, mix the flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt.

When the bran has soaked for ten minutes, scoop it into the bowl with the oil and egg mixture.  Stir until just combined.  Stir in the flour mixture until just combined.  Add the apple pieces and stir until just combined.   Using a mellon baller, ice cream scoop or spoon, transfer the batter into a muffin tin lined with paper liners (fill the liners 3/4 or 4/5 of the way up).

Bake the muffins for 15-20 minutes, or until the middles have set and a tester inserted in the muffins comes out clean.